That urge of making things aesthetically engaging to frame an outlook of the Intro part; you know it's hard to find the perfectly imperfect start but yet somehow I manage to write it down . This time it's different coz I'm just trying to go with the title itself which says "defamiliarizing what is known, in order to know it differently or more deeply"; the theories, experiences, what I'm gonna tell or whether it happens to everybody or just me ....... Deja vu or just made up , but everything I'll write it's just the third person pov...( but I would love to call it non-cliched)
Show put up against our will to make way for manifestation of our original thoughts, is just like an escape room build for the outcasts to believe that they could actually fit in . The most dangerous of all types of grief is the one which is originated from pain but in reality is grossly offensive( A word to describe an electronic message fault that leaves a person feeling apprehension because the message was targeted at them or a group of which they are part).
Umm, period, the fact I can write these thoughts is just another display of my self talk session because the originality of anything is not that it came from something yet it's the blend of what we know and about what we can brag about with a snap (only applicable to emotional system coz ,duh! not a science
geek ).
Manipulation is an art for the weak and the personality trait for the crackheads , however it's better to have a plan B so rather it should be "intentional manipulative dumbass" meaning playing with dumbness(my own dictionary of emotions) , not necessarily the path to go for but a safe zone to avoid the post grief-denial phase(still there? good to see you )......
Google has a very opinionated side on self talk, mine is nothing less; not just mere utterance of words, yet the mirror of your wants and needs; distinguished natures yet acknowledge it with the type of card they fit in:
1. Text card= introverts who have the best control over their choice of words and phrases(admit it, you can't beat these freaks)
2. Social card= you need one to see one or simply you feel alive with your own tribe.
3. In-between card= neutral opinions, can play both cards yet a good deceiver.
You speak(the self session) on the basis of trauma or excitement you are in , theoretically -yes, practically-no; I believe it's just me and me thing ;comes with perks like self roast and realization , no time issue, trustworthy, good vocab coach and giving us what we don't know we want..
When you don't have the heart to tell them, that's not what you wanted..
Everyone is bad in someone else's story, clean records are for those who have a dependent nature, souls like us are busy playing hide and seek with the one's having situational needs..
If I were to write about all the reasons that I am grateful for , trust me ,it's always somewhere in between this feeling; happy to get through the bad times and sad to know that goodness never lasts ..
Awareness : anxiety is never a big issue until it's clearly visible , like normally it stands out as a feeling of nervousness or unease about something but it can look like this as well; frequently zoning out, depersonalization, fidgeting, shaking for no reason, biting lips and nails, loss of appetite and much worse when you go through it, yourself...
Complexity is tuned with the uncontrollable emotions leading to distraction and losing one's own self. Admiring the best is inclusive of all the breakdowns and emotional damages , if the acceptance has "what if" as the base , it's better to build your own path coz criticism suits well on those faces who actually have a backstage filled with the supporters .
"it's the rain of blessings
she had a lively soul,
no heartbreak, no stabbing , still it's hard to call,
there's a tiny little room with the tiny little door,
moments of happiness on the tiny little floor..
she shivered , she wept, heart ached for warmth,
but the pain and grief came back and forth.
lost in the world of emptiness,
the water still flows, flowers bloom.
leaves are shedding, fall is here
year went by and she's still there.
blame her once, she has a heart to fight
but where did it go ,when she sobbed all night"
I just heard someone say " just because you love me , doesn't mean I feel loved by you"
WOW........
feeling too depressed ; go watch Abhishek Upmanyu (#standup comedians are the best ) or Omegle videos
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